Keeping Multiple Friends for Christian Growth

Keeping Multiple Friends for Christian Growth

BLOG March 2025

Having served in ministry in three different denominational settings and having consulted with over one hundred churches ranging from independent to Baptist to Brethren to Assembly of God to Bible Fellowship to Presbyterian, I have found growth in Christ through them all. I provide a Catechetical daily devotional on the Westminster Shorter Catechism as well as a daily commentary on the works of C.S. Lewis. My Christian friends range from strict Reformed Baptist to Calvinistic Presbyterians to Wesleyan Brethren in Christ to community Bible people. Instead of finding myself confused and bewildered by these associations and friendships, I find myself challenged, enriched and broadened by their insights and comments. How is this done?

My Reformed or Calvinistic friends remind me that it is by God’s sovereign grace I am what I am. Trained as a budding mathematician, I chose seminary and the ministry mostly due to the counsel of friends and the opportunities for sharing the Bible with others in a number of different environments. Trained at Westminster Theological Seminary in Philadelphia and doing graduate work there and at Gordon Conwell Seminary in Massachusetts gave me a deep seated appreciation and conviction that the Reformed way is eminently biblical and the foundation for teaching and helping others come to grips with God’s Word. My Reformed friends constantly remind me of those roots and the ensuing studies and work they do in that venue. They sometimes question my allegiances and church associations, but they generally support my calling and gifting and where and to whom God has led me in over forty years of ministry.

My Wesleyan tinged Arminian friends challenge me to greater holiness and intimacy with Christ. They and their writings have deepened my holiness journey and have taken me along paths quite outside of my Calvinistic roots and training. However, instead of confusing me or forcing me to choose “sides,” I have found a greater freedom to serve Christ and others in churches and ministries that move along differing Christian paths and studies. They have helped me be more open-minded and curious about differing Christian paths. I, on the other hand, have been able to challenge them as to their biblical theological reasonings and have broadened their reading and journey in other directions.

My non-Christian friends have helped me bear witness to God’s gospel of grace and the message of the kingdom of God. They have helped me see that they matter to God as well as my deeply devoted Christian brethren. They have forced me to find ways to love them in Christ and help them see their eternal needs can be met only in Him. I play tennis regularly with many of them and find in those opportunities for competition times to pray with and for them and remind them they are made in God’s image and for his glory.

In this broadening network of friends and complexity of relationships, I have found my calling and ministry and life enriched and challenged and made more full. God has been good to me in these varied and diverse friendships. I would urge those who read this blog to open themselves up to broadening friendships and experiences for greater and deeper and more satisfying growth as Christians.